You should be in movies. I know you have what it takes. You just haven't received the break you deserve. But listen, nothing's going to happen if you just lie around waiting for it to happen — waiting to be discovered. You have got to get out there and take the bull by the horns.
But how? you ask. How do I take the bull by the horns? Don't fret, you've come to the right guy. I know the ropes, and I am willing to share my knowledge with you. I want to help you get started with an action-plan that will put you on the path to stardom. You heard me correctly — the path to stardom. And what's more, my advice is free, with no obligations on your part, and it includes a money-back guarantee if you're not completely satisfied. OK. Let's get started.
First, you are going to want to figure out just how to expose yourself in a manner that will create attention. You know — make a splash. But not just a random splash. This is not about causing a ruckus at Starbucks, or intentionally running into somebody’s car thinking that will get you into the spotlight. You have to plan your splash more carefully than that.
Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.
- Oscar Wilde
Location, location, location. We've all heard that said a thousand times, and it's as true now as it ever was. You need to be in the right spot at the right time. You need to be somewhere where movies are actually being made — that's where the action is. That's where stars are born.
Right away you are immediately thinking of a city, the name of which begins with an 'H'. Hey! Guess what? That's what everybody is thinking. True, some movies are still made here in Hollywood, but there are so many goofballs trying to make a splash in this town, you will sure as hell get lost in the shuffle. There is just no room to splash in this place anymore. No, you have got to find a location where you'll stick out from the competition.
You might be surprised to learn that films are being made quite close to where you live. You might not be aware that there are facilities with cameras and lights and sound equipment , make-up girls, stylists, and producer/director types within driving distance of your very own home. If you have a local TV station in your area, you can be pretty sure they have a production facility there, a studio where real TV commercials are being produced.
Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of anybody else.
- Judy Garland
Commercials? you ask, but I wanna be in real movies. Sure, but do you have any idea how many successful actors and actresses got their start in those commercials? Brad Pitt for Pringles, Lindsay Lohan — Jello, Leonardo DiCaprio for a clothing store. The list goes on and on.
Now, listen up! Some of the commercials made in your area are filmed with live studio audiences, and this means that S.A.P's (Studio Audience Personalities) are getting major facetime on camera.
It's a well known fact, yet, nevertheless, a closely guarded secret, that movie producers, directors, agents and casting agencies prioritize infomercial studio audiences in their constant search for new talent. The industry is saving millions each year by foregoing costly auditions and screen tests in favor of ISABS (Infomercial Studio Audience Behavioral Studies). They're picking the cherries right out of the fruit bowl and it's costing them nothing as the infomercial production companies are unwittingly picking up the tab.
"Movies are open doors, and at every door, I change character and life...I live for the present always. I accept this risk. I don't deny the past, but it's a page to turn."
- Juliette Binoche
So, it's time for you to get in touch with a studio in your area that does infomercials and offer those people your services as a S.A.P. Don't expect these guys to shout Hallelujah just because you called them up. Don't expect star treatment from the onset. Let them know that you have no illusions about financial compensation for your time and effort. The free coffee and cake they serve is quite sufficient for you. And if they don't serve free coffee and cake, that is OK as well. Remember the words of Marlon Brando — Never confuse the size of your paycheck with the size of your talent.
Being cast in the roll of a S.A.P. is obviously not your final success point, but it can be an important steppingstone in your career. Be warned, though. You won't be alone out there. The audience will be jam-packed with aspiring actors and actresses who will stop at nothing to get ahead in this business. You must outshine them in every way. How to do that? Read on!
What you should know
First of all, you must believe in the part you are playing and become one with it. The great acting coach Konstantin Stanislavsky taught us that we must take hold of our role, as if it were our own life. He asks us to speak for our character in our own person so that we become the spirit of our character's spirit and the flesh of his flesh. Does this sound like a tough assignment to you? You might ask yourself: what if I can't identify with the role I am supposed to play?
Knock-knock, Hello! As a S.A.P. you will be playing an intelligent, middle-class consumer who wants more from life than the ordinary bill-of-fare at Home Depot , Lowe's or Walgreens. Someone who demands smart solutions at smart prices. Could you not take hold of that role as if it was your own life? Here is the bare knuckle truth, my friend; If you can't slip into this role, how could you, when called for later on in your career, portray, say, a mass-murderer, a crooked politician or a vampire?
But caution! Being the spirit of our character's spirit and the flesh of his flesh does not mean being a ham. Think how many potentially great infomercials have been ruined by the excessive antics and overblown exuberance of hams in the studio audience. These people who call themselves actors think that their showbiz chances are going to increase in proportion to the amount of screwball enthusiasm they exhibit. No, sir, that's not how it works in the big time.
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
- Kurt Vonnegut
They're phonies, and it shines through like the old dents in a newly repainted car. These phonies can't act. And they don't believe. Put that equation together, will you? Can't act + don't believe. What do you get? Fakers, philistines, hypocrites. NO, this is not you. You are for real. You're a believer and you've got star quality. Just pay attention to the ground rules of the trade I've included here. Following them carefully could mean the difference between standing in line for shrimp and cocktails at a Hollywood producer's VIP party and standing in line for food stamps.